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lolololol

Are you gonna put a bard in here, ZeeAche-sama?
"with my new, evil, bardly powers..."


I likes it. "Time does not..."

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"I fell off the mountain of words at around the 10,000ft mark. Tell my family...they owe me money." -Narratorway

"If you retort against this, so help me God I'll shove any part of your anatomy I can find into some other part. Figuratively, of course." - Josh

"We have more, can deliver tuesday." - Del S

Good old CoN

Is this the end for our valliant heroes?
Will MG ever try Thai food?
Will Zeph ever stop being (MG's standard of) a Mexican?
Will ZH ever see the superiority of DC over Marvel?
Most importantly, will the next chapter be on time?
Find out next time one TORI!!!

This post has been edited by Dark Paladin on 1st January 2005 03:51

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"I had to write four novels before they let me write comic books."
-Brad Meltzer

Whoa. Totally cool. Keep that pen going, boy.

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"No matter what happens, I will always be with you... forever." ---- Pocahontas, Pocahontas

"Only those who are already at the top are rewarded without trying."----- Delita Hyral, Final Fantasy Tactics

http://www.ffshrine.org/fft/fft-midi/1-42-back_fire01.mid ---- My favorite FFT battle song

It'll have to be figuratively. As far as I know, he types everything out. -_^

Like me...

--------------------

~Status Report~

* Completed... Dragon's Head
* Completed... Soldiers of the Empire: Disciples (release pending)
* In Progress/Undecided... Of Love and Betrayal
* Planning/Assembly... Where it all Began

Curse thee writers block, I condemn thee to the pits of hell.
***

Chapter 11
A monster

ZeroHawk woke up alone in a large bed. The room was white, with a reddish meld painted into it. The room was also rather bare. ZH gave a small sigh as he tried to sit up. Failure. Aches and pains shot through his body. He did notice a buddha poster above him however.

"Maybe whoever rescued me's a buddhist. Anyway, where's my furry midget and my slave?"" ZH queried.

ZH glanced over to the door, which was in disrepair. There was a large hole in the bottom left of it, the doorknob was missing, and the door itself appeared to be quite brittle. A blonde woman pushed the door open and came in.

"So you're finally awake eh you lazy bum?" She asked

"Eh, yeah, I seem to be." ZH responded

"Then you know I'm going to have to make you pay me back for letting you use that bed for a night." She said

"Uh, ok." ZH raised a brow

"You're going to become a slave." She said

"...great. What's it pay?" ZH asked eagerly

"Swill, Hardtack, and Stagnant Water, if you're lucky. Now rest up, i'm going to have plenty of work for you." She cackled

ZH sighed and a mild delirium consumed him, before he passed back out.

Days passed, ZH awoke to the woman jabbing him in the side. With a large rusty fork nonetheless.

"Hey, you, wake up, get to work!" She commanded.

ZH mumbled and climbed out of the bed. The woman gave ZH some clothes which he promptly put on, before stepping out of the room, into a kitchen. She followed him, and pushed him over to a sink and dishwasher. The sink was stacked with dishes, towering over him.

"CLEAN THEM ALL" She instructed.

"You're joking." ZH said

"No, clean them." She firmly responded.

ZH laughed as the woman left and began to do a halfass job of cleaning the dishes. And by halfass I mean that he grabbed a dirty dish ran it under the water until it looked almost clean, but was more than likely still greasy, and then stacked it on the counter. He only finished about half of them before stopping.

"Done!" ZH shouted

The woman promptly showed up, a brow raised as she noticed the dishes in the sink.

"You're not done there's dishes still in the sink." She glared at him.

"Those uh... aren't mine." He responded.

"Yes they are, they're all yours!"

"...No they aren't, I washed my dishes. Those are your dishes." He said, keeping a straight face.

"YOUR DISHES AREN'T EVEN CLEAN" She was beginning to grow angry

"I beg to differ." He held back a laugh

She stood there for a moment, struck with awe, before brandishing a knife.

"I'LL KILL-" Her voice shifted over to a mannish voice "Wake up"

The woman began to disappear as the words overtook ZH

"Wake up"

The words echoed in his head. The world around him faded to blackness as the words consumed him.

"ZH you lazy bum, WAKE UP." MoogleGenocide instructed as he kicked him hard in the gut.

ZH gave a small whimper as he opened his eyes to find that they were in a dark stone room, Zephir was in the corner leaning against the wall.

"Ugh... I feel like hell. How are you guys alright?" ZH asked.

"Well, we landed on you. And it's not so much we landed on you as, at the last second I grabbed you and pushed you under me to use you to cushion the blow." MG said. "At least you're good for something, Mr Meatshield."

"Wait, what about him?" ZH pointed at Zeph as he weakly climbed to his feet.

"Oh, yeah, well, he landed on you, and I landed on the both of you, softest pitfall i've ever had." MG grinned.

"...I think I need a doctor." ZH said.

"Why?" MG queried

Zeph glanced over at them as he pushed off the wall

"I don't think my arm is supposed to bend this way." ZH replied

Zeph laughed "Maybe you're just double jointed like my old grandpa Lou, he used to dislocate his shoulder and then sue people."

"Greedy mexican, he couldn't just GET A JOB could he?" MG raised a brow

"Moneys money right?" Zeph shrugged

"I want money..." ZH interjected

MG simply glared as he turned for the door, which was pushed open by a man in bardish clothing. Around his neck was a guitar strap, attached to a guitar, and on his head was a bards hat, which bore the logo of the Yankees.

"Who the HELL are you?" MG asked

"I am the king of rice, lord of the guitar, and your only road out of here." He strummed his guitar lightly. "Come now, follow me."

"Personally I say we jump him and loot his corpse." ZH said, getting an approving nod from Zeph.

MG shook his head "We're lost, we need him, c'mon."

"Fine, but when we're poor don't come yelling at old mexicano Zephir, eh?" Zeph said.

"Hey, what happened to all the gold, why didn't it fall with us? ZH asked.

"SHUT UP AND COME ON!" MG said

Zeph and ZH sighed and walked through the door behind the two, the Yankees fan led the way. They went through a couple of dark tunnels straight ahead, before taking a left turn. They then went straight ahead for a while again, before going left, then straight, left, straight, and right. Finally there seemed to be a light at the end of the tunnel. MG volunteered to investigate the light. He approached it slowly, the light growing larger with each step, until it revealed itself to be a doorway.

A strong fragrant scent was overpowering MG as he peered into the doorway. The room was lit romantically, as if someone were expecting a lover or something of the sort. His senses were telling him to look away, but he didn't, he continued to peer around the room. To his left he noticed a very large naked man, muscular build, obvious steroid user. The man was staring at himself naked in the mirror while wearing a pushup bra.

"Teehee, Gabe, you so sexy." He said. "You want to try on the sexy black thong?"

"Why yes Gabe hunni I do." He responded obviously having a conversation with his mirror self.

Gabe then turned to grab the thong, noticing MG standing the doorway.

"Hey hunni, i've been waiting for you." Gabe said as he put on the thong and stared at MG

MG watched in horror "I think you have the wrong person."

"No I love furry midgets, you're just the right person." Gabe said.

"Really? Well, i've gotta go, nice meeting you." MG turned and began to walk away.

"Nobody run from Gabe... GABE NEED LOVE GABE SMASH!" Gabe growled in fury as he grew three times bigger and purple, his thong and bra ripping and falling off.

"RUN FOR YOUR LIFE BIG THERES A BIG NAKED MAN AFTER US!" MG shouted

ZH practically threw the others down as he began running for his own life.

"I'M TOO YOUNG TO BE SODOMIZED!" He screamed as he ran from corridor to corridor leading the way to get away from Gabe.

Gabe however was never far behind, he had caught the scent of furry midget, and intended to get his fill.

"GABE WANT TO BE LOVED" He shouted as he chased them

"YOU WITH THE GUITAR DO SOMETHING" Zeph shouted

"Okie dokie." He said as he began strumming and running "Afffffffffffflaaaaaaaaaaaaaac!"

"GABE HATE DUCKS GABE SMASH!" Gabe screamed

"Sure, piss him off more." MG said

"THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT" ZH glared

And so they ran from corridor to corridor for hours upon hours. To avoid the huge naked man. Finally it seemed they had escaped him, when they dove into a tiny hole through which he could not follow.

"So how the hell do we get out of here." Zeph asked

"I dunno, I thought rice man here knew how." MG replied.

"Hey call me Sabs, oh shrimpy one." Sabs mumbled

"I'll kick you in the shins bardboy." MG muttered.

They all stood around for a while, catching their breath. There wasn't much else to do for the time being. ZH made a sand castle though out of the sand he found. But that made MG mad, so he came over and stomped it out. ZH was saddened by this act, but MG found great amusement in it.

"The great republic of SandCastia... destroyed..." ZH whimpered."

"By the hands of MoogleGenocide the foul, yesssss." MG cackled.

"Brave soldiers gave their lives defending this place, never forget. SEMPER-FI!" ZH shouted

"...What?" Zeph raised a brow as he looked over to him.

"I dunno I saw it on tv once." ZH sighed.

"...I like rice." Sabs said. "Oh I remember how to get out of here now."

"...you do?" MG raised a brow.

"Oh yeah." Sabs nodded

"Awesome, lead away." ZH said.

Sabs pulled open a secret door from behind himself which revealed a staircase leading up into a dark alleyway outside.

"...No effing way." MG said.

"I can't help but feel that this is wrong somehow." Zeph said.

"Just come on." Sabs said.

So the group left up the stairs, that had magically appeared, and at last they were free, back into the city.

This post has been edited by Zero_Hawk on 26th March 2005 20:04

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This one time I punched a bear in the forehead TO DEATH! I still have the scars on my chest. I am the manliest man that ever did man.

League: Z3roHawk
Steam: Zero_Hawk
Wii U: Zero_Hawk
FF14 - Goblin - Zero Hawk <Fiend>

Lololol. Yessss. Good thing Gabe doesn't check the forums too often :-P

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If you've been mod-o-fied,
It's an illusion, and you're in-between.
Don't you be tarot-fied,
It's just alot of nothing, so what can it mean?
~Frank Zappa

Sins exist only for people who are on the Way or approaching the Way

*lol* Sorry, I can't *lol* say much... *choke* I'm too... *lol* busy--- laughing... *lol*

--------------------

"No matter what happens, I will always be with you... forever." ---- Pocahontas, Pocahontas

"Only those who are already at the top are rewarded without trying."----- Delita Hyral, Final Fantasy Tactics

http://www.ffshrine.org/fft/fft-midi/1-42-back_fire01.mid ---- My favorite FFT battle song

Quote (Zero_Hawk @ 26th March 2005 01:05)

"Brave soldiers gave their lives defending this place, never forget. SEMPER-FI!" ZH shouted

I assume thats the motto of the United States Moron Corps there... not the US Marines.

What more can I say but frickin' hillarious Mr. Bigglesworth?

--------------------

"Only the dead have seen the end of their quotes being misattributed to Plato."
-George Santayana

"The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here..."
-Abraham Lincoln, prior to the discovery of Irony.

*choked on his hair laughing*
OMG... I love the FF4-survivor remark

--------------------

"I fell off the mountain of words at around the 10,000ft mark. Tell my family...they owe me money." -Narratorway

"If you retort against this, so help me God I'll shove any part of your anatomy I can find into some other part. Figuratively, of course." - Josh

"We have more, can deliver tuesday." - Del S

Good old CoN

Quote (Dark Paladin @ 31st December 2004 22:45)

Most importantly, will the next chapter be on time?

Apparently not.

--------------------

"I had to write four novels before they let me write comic books."
-Brad Meltzer

I was struggling for the longest time with the issue of who to make the next character. Sorry for the delay. If it's any consolation i've got plenty of ideas bubbling in my head for the next chapter that I just need to put to paper.

--------------------

This one time I punched a bear in the forehead TO DEATH! I still have the scars on my chest. I am the manliest man that ever did man.

League: Z3roHawk
Steam: Zero_Hawk
Wii U: Zero_Hawk
FF14 - Goblin - Zero Hawk <Fiend>

All of them are great and to tell the truth it is the most interesting thing I've read in a while.

Good Deal, Keep it up.

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Money is no good unspent.
There's a fine line between bravery and stupidity.

The Great Republic of Sandcastia... destroyed... ;_;

Edit

Sabs' Yankees logo didn't come out too well. :-/ Gomen ne

This post has been edited by Zephir on 6th April 2005 04:20

Attached Image


--------------------

~Status Report~

* Completed... Dragon's Head
* Completed... Soldiers of the Empire: Disciples (release pending)
* In Progress/Undecided... Of Love and Betrayal
* Planning/Assembly... Where it all Began