CoN 20th Anniversary: 1997-2017
people it is emotionally draining to be around

Posted: 30th July 2018 00:25

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Black Waltz
Posts: 883

Joined: 12/7/2011

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Celebrated the CoN 20th Anniversary at the forums. Member of more than five years. User has rated 25 fanarts in the CoN galleries. 
Especially very prolific and imaginative writers who can't shut the hell up. I understand they are known in society for being, to use a colloquialism, "a pain in the ass."

... Have you ever known someone whom was emotionally draining to be around? How did you resolve the situation? Did it end when you moved out? Did you progress in life beyond the frustration of dealing with them? Did the anger generated by their incessant and pedantic argument for the sake of argument and volatile temper ever stop interfering with your ability to have a good time?

I know; it's a depressing topic and you have a psyche to maintain. But my life has sort of been spent on delving into the depressing realities of existence that nobody else is willing to think about...like, back to when I was 12 and kind of lost it after an injury to the head...

True story. Still breathin' though, and kind of kicking your butt at the guitar. Ha ha.

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Posted: 11th August 2018 10:20

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Palace Guard
Posts: 2,567

Joined: 17/1/2001

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Celebrated the CoN 20th Anniversary at the forums. Member of more than ten years. Member of more than five years. Second place in CoNCAA, 2002. 
Has more than thirty news submissions to CoN. Contributed to the Final Fantasy I section of CoN. Vital involvement in the Final Fantasy VII section of CoN. 
One important first step is to set boundaries. This can be hard, because the other person may resist. You have to learn how to say no, and that "No" is a complete sentence. You also need to learn how to not explain yourself. "I have other plans" and "That doesn't work for me" are also complete sentences, and as an adult, you don't have to elaborate on your reasons for what you do with your time. If you want to go sit in the park and do nothing, that is your decision and you don't need to explain why. You can also say "I have to go now" and leave the room that person is in if they are making you uncomfortable.

Moving out can help a LOT. I'm not sure if you've heard this saying about depression, but I've been told that if you start to feel like maybe you're depressed or getting down on yourself a lot, you should check to see if there are any toxic people in your life because they are often the cause of those feelings.

If this person is abusive, you do not have to have any kind of relationship with them. Even if it's a family member. If this is someone that you have a child with, then that's more complicated, but even then you can set clear boundaries.



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